As we draw this 30 day project to a close, I want to recap for you the essence of what we need to do, be and act upon as parents, that will provide the very best environment for our kids to grow up in, so they know how to deal with life’s inevitable ups and downs.
Today’s lesson talks about these changes and what it means for how parents approach their child’s behaviour and arm them with the tools they’ll need to adults in THEIR lifetime, not the lifetime we grew up in as kids, which is no longer relevant.
As our fast paced world evolves and the exposure your child has to life experiences, so too has their brain development.
We’re seeing kids move into the adolescence years much sooner than 13 years old. Now, it’s beginning as young as 8 years old!
That’s scary, right?
Today’s video talks about the different ways to speak to your kids and how they influence the results that you get.
Are you being too flippant, too soft, to harsh, to loud, too soft, too serious, too playful, or with speaking without intention or conviction? All of these play a part in our voices falling on deaf ears.
What happens if you’re trying to address your child’s behaviour in these different ways, but they’re still not listening? What if there’s been so much water under the bridge your relationship is damaged and you just don’t know where to start to find this more amicable, more loving relationship.
Today we’re going to be looking at your approach and a practical approach to avoiding all the shouting, lack of co-operation and worry about being late that typically goes on in most households every morning.
How do you want your child to handle the unwanted situations that inevitably show up at times during our life? Do you want them to roll around in their missing out lens or do you want them to be able to accept the reality of the unwanted and get solution focussed about it?
Parents are often trying to teach their children about life, right in the middle of an emotional situation and when they’re in an emotion of stress (hurt, anger, defensiveness).
But guess what? They can’t hear you?
We need to get curious about why they are behaving that way. We need to accept the reality that they are, and shift our attention to the why.
To do this, there are three key areas of your child’s life we need to focus on
It’s time to get into observation mode and really SEE, HEAR and UNDERSTAND your child’s behaviour in preparation for section two of this program, where we’re moving into “Your child and their emotions”.
When consumed by situations that repeatedly show you evidence that you’re not getting what you want, your mindset stops asking.
You stop getting specific. You lose hope that you can have it. Sometimes you don’t even think about what you do want.
You’ve been learning how the mind returns to you evidence of what you have your attention on.
Let me show you how easily we can catastrophise things and think in ‘absolutes’ that keep us stuck in a narrow minded viewpoint, away from solutions
Your mindset is effecting EVERYTHING you do as a parent, and even just as a person. When faced with something challenging, you can so easily get stuck in a war in your head that is literally stopping you from handling the challenges you face, effectively.
Why are you focussing on me when its my child I need help with?
In today’s very first video, I explain why it is imperative that we have a conversation about you and your emotions and behaviours as a part of your overall parenting strategy.